7 Quick Takes (Vol. 36)

 -1-

It just hit me this week that I'm going to have a baby in a MONTH.  It's not like there's much to get ready....I pretty much know what I'm doing by now, and we already have all the "baby stuff" - it's just a matter of dragging it all up from the basement (a job for my husband, and not me).  But I'm not sure that I've really mentally prepared for it.

-2-

Tom is scheduled to go on a business trip less than two weeks before my due date (!).  It's something he *could* get out of, but it's potentially useful for his career that he go.  We've been discussing the pros and cons.  My other two kids were born a little early - seven days and five days, respectively.  Still, the chances of this baby being farther ahead of schedule seem rather slim....

On the other hand, if I did go into labor while Tom was gone, it would be a pretty big deal.  To be honest, I don't think I'd mind too much about my husband missing the birth (at least I'll still have my doula with me!).  It's that I would have to deal with all the arrangements completely by myself - having contractions at home (hopefully at home, and not out somewhere!) while making frantic phone calls, trying to find someone willing to pick up and entertain my kids for the day (or night?) as well as a ride to the hospital for myself.  Usually, Tom handles all that stuff, because while I'm in labor, I'm just not in the right state of mind to deal with all that crap.

We still haven't made the final decision about what he's going to do....but I think we're leaning towards him going.  Yikes!

-3-

Earlier this week, I watched Milo and Otis for the first time since I was really young.  Oh. my. goodness.  First of all, I felt like the whole premise of the film was: "let's have Milo and Otis encounter any and every type of creature we can get ahold of - whether or not it makes sense for that species to appear in this particular landscape - and just see what they do with each other."  Did you know that lobsters and crabs live on farms?  Neither did I.  It really strained credibility to see the combinations of animals that supposedly lived together in this imaginary country.

But mostly, I was seriously disturbed the entire time by all the risky situations they put those poor animals into.  Was it really necessary to send the cat down a waterfall in a wooden box, or have the dog fight with a bear?  There is NO WAY some animals weren't killed or seriously injured during the filming.  I checked Wikipedia, and it seems that many others have had the same concerns...

-4-

It seems like all the cool bloggers are going to the Edel Gathering this summer.  It sounds like a really great event, but unfortunately, I won't be there.  Not only would it be difficult to swing financially, but....having to bring a four-month old baby would just make it a lot less enjoyable, I have to be honest!  I'll try not to feel jealous of the opportunity to meet so many interesting Catholic ladies.

-5-

I've been starting to think about Lent (which starts March 5th this year!), how I should observe it, and what to give up.  I'm afraid the whole season will get rather overshadowed by all the stressful (but exciting) things we have going on these next two months: signing on the house, fixing up some stuff in the house prior to move-in, giving birth, planning a baptism, moving day... (ideally in this order, but the "having a baby" part I don't really have any control over!).

-6-

I'm thinking I should definitely reduce my internet use during Lent, since it can get out-of-control at times.  And I don't even own a laptop, tablet, smartphone, or any of that stuff.  Very intentionally, we have only a desktop computer.  And that is temptation enough for me, believe me.  A practice I think would be good, yet challenging, is to not allow myself to use the internet except when the kids are in bed - for naps or the night.  So many times during the day, I pop into the room just to "check my e-mail", and it turns into twenty minutes of browsing Facebook or reading random articles people post about "23 things you'll only remember if you were born in the 80s" or something else stupid like that.  It's unnecessary, and it takes time away from my family.

Kendra has some great ideas for Lent that I will have to look over again.

-7-

Aaaaand, because I'm running out of ideas, I'll share a few recent quotes from my little man.

Listening to a song with the lyric, "there he knelt down on the floor."
Sly: "That song just said 'meltdown on the floor' - Stella does that!!"

Sly, to Tom, as soon as he walked in the door after work: "Mommy said I can't have a snack because I lied. What's up with that?!"

Sly and I were waiting forever for Stella to climb up the stairs.
Me: "What's taking her so long?"
Sly: "Probably gravity."

Quick Takes is hosted at Conversion Diary

On Valentine's Eve

I had planned to have some women from the Catholic Moms group over last night to make "Valentine's Day surprises" for our husbands - basically spending a fun evening making chocolate-covered goodies (Oreos, strawberries, pretzels, etc.), talking, laughing, drinking, sampling.  And sending everyone home with a bag of chocolatey yummies to share with their loved ones for Valentine's Day.

Unfortunately, the weather didn't cooperate.  Unexpected snow during the day made the roads pretty bad, and people started cancelling, and...well, I decided it would be best to move it to sometime post-Valentine's Day when we could get a better turnout.  It was a bummer.

BUT I still had a container of fresh strawberries in the fridge, and I knew they wouldn't stay good until next week.  So I had the brilliant idea of letting my two toddlers help me make chocolate-dipped strawberries instead.  It was, as expected, an enormous mess.  But still mostly a good time.

Stella just dipped and licked the whole time

Thank goodness for IKEA's full-body bibs!

Yes, I'm still in pajama pants at 7:30pm....this is uncharacteristic of me, I swear! :-)

Sly got to "lick the bowl"

Not too bad-looking

Enjoying the fruits of our labor

 

I realized, for the first time, that strawberries look a lot like hearts.  I feel like someone could come up with some neat symbolism or theological parallel with this....but that person is not me :-)

Happy (St.) Valentine's Day!

Starting to Feel Like a "Real Mom"

Well, we finally bit the bullet and got a mini-van!  It really wasn't a hard sell on my part.  With a third kid on the way, we knew we needed more space for the car seats.  100% of the people I asked for recommendations of family-friendly cars (both in real life, and on this blog - thanks again, everyone!) positively raved about the benefits of mini-vans, saying they were *the* best vehicle for families.  And I believed them.  It's what I grew up riding in, and the type of car I learned to drive on.  And the thought of the increased amount of cargo space had me drooling.  Tom - as many men are - was fairly reluctant to have to join the legions of what he sees as totally-dorky-family-friendly-vehicle-driving-dads...but it had to happen.

We sold our old car and also bought this used van (a Dodge Caravan) via Craigslist.  I was nervous at first about doing everything through private sales like that, but it was easier - and much less expensive - than I expected.  The van is in great shape, with practically the same mileage as our previous car...and yet we netted $1000 overall from the trade - with some bonus room-to-grow to boot!

Tom refused to be in the shot with us - he's been playing up how embarrassed he is to own a mini-van

I feel like SUCH a mom now.  I mean, of course I've been a mom for several years, but....come on, I'm driving a mini-van!  We're (in the process of) buying a house!  I'm turning into my parents, man.  Not that that's a bad thing.  But it seems like not so long ago, I was still a carefree college student...

My younger brothers were all teasing us at dinner last night about "dropping the kids off at soccer practice" in our big old mini-van.

Also, a question for those who have blazed this trail before me:  The kids will be ages 3.5, 1.5, and newborn.  Any suggestions for the best seating arrangement?  I'm thinking of putting the youngest two in the second row (bucket seats), and Sly alone in the back seat.  I'll feel bad for him, though, since he'll be too far away to hand him stuff while I'm driving, or to have conversation with :-(

***

On a related note, I got my hair cut recently (which you can see in the photo above).  The lady chopped off seven inches, and this is the shortest it's been in many years.

Tom has always preferred me with long hair, and has begged me to keep it as long as possible.  Ever since Sly was born, I've been tempted from time to time to cut it to a more manageable length, but my dear husband has always expressed his extreme dislike for so-called "mom haircuts".  But I finally just got tired of dealing with so much hair, and announced that I was "going short!"  I think *maybe* I just said that to scare Tom a little, because I didn't even get it cut that short anyways - still past shoulder-length.  But now it's so much easier to deal with!

Tom's response when he saw it: "Ok.  It's not as bad as I expected."  ...whatever, I'll take it.

I probably needed a new "mom haircut" to go with my dorky new mini-van anyways :-)

Setting up a Home Altar

When we got married, one of the first things Tom insisted on was that we create a home altar.  I had seen such things at the homes of a few Catholic families we knew, but never really understood how they were "used," or why they had decided to dedicate a specific area of their house for one.  I resisted for a while, not wanting to sacrifice any space in our tiny little duplex towards something that I felt we would never actually use.  Tom won out in the end, though, and we set up a little altar.  I'm glad he insisted on it, because I've seen the graces that the altar has brought to our family and our prayer life.
 

So What is the Purpose of a Home Altar?

1. It provides a location for prayer in your home.  A gathering place for the family to come together.  The home can truly become the "Domestic Church."

2. It can serve as a focal point - or focusing point - in the house/room.  When you pass by, it's a subtle reminder that your home life is to be centered around God.  It calls your mind to prayer.

"As we have altars and shrines in our churches, so a Catholic family would do well to keep a simple but dignified shrine in the home.  It would be an appropriate symbol to all members that their lives belong to God; that religion and prayer are not merely a Sunday affair, and that the Christian home is a holy place."  (Francis X. Weiser, S.J., The Year of the Lord in the Christian Home)

3. It a great place to live out the Liturgical year (especially if you remember to change some of the colors, images, etc. to correspond with the various seasons and feast of the Church).

"Thus the pulsing life of Christ's love and grace, radiating from the visual representation, will imbue our children with the sweet and solid spirit of piety based on the liturgy of the Church. There will be no need of elaborate explanations; for what the children see at the shrine will impress their hearts and minds more eloquently than a flood of words could do." (ibid.)

4. It can serve as a statement to all who enter your home as guests that your household is one that strives to have God at the center.

5. This one is objectively less important, but it's one of my favorite parts of our altar: it provides storage!  We keep many of our holy cards, medals, Rosaries, extra scapulars, and prayer books inside.  It is always easy to find what we need for our personal devotions, or to change the items we placed out on top as the liturgical season changes.

Creating a Home Altar

Your altar can really be as simple or elaborate as you like, as long as it is conducive to prayer.  The most basic requirements are just: a surface, and some sort of prayer aid(s) to place on it. 

Finding a good surface

We used to have an old-fashioned console-style record player (which didn't work anymore) as our altar.  When we moved into our current place, we replaced it with a nice $40 cabinet off Craigslist which has plenty of storage inside for all our "prayer stuff."  Other possible surfaces for your altar are almost endless.  Any sort of tabletop, a shelf, a mantle, a radiator cover....maybe just not on top of the television, as that doesn't seem to be very conducive to reflection and prayer!

What kinds of objects might go on an altar?

You probably have many things around your house already...a crucifix, images, icons, statues, candles, holy water, Rosaries, prayer cards, flowers, prayer books, incense, blessed objects, relics(!) ....anything that might lift your heart to God or help you to pray.  Many people like to put down an altar cloth or linen of some sort.  If you like, you could even find/make some in different colors, and switch them with the liturgical season, as they do at Mass.

Where should the altar be located in the home?

I'd say ideally in a common area such as a family room.  But you also want it to be functional, so it's best to be in a place where the family will actually be able to comfortably gather around for prayer.  This might end up being a bedroom or the dining room or some other part of the house.  (Bonus points if you can orient it on an eastern wall!)

Our Altar

Pretty simple.  I change out the cloth occasionally (I have a nice little stash of lace and embroidered cloths collected over the years from flea markets/thrift stores).  At this point, I really just switch them as a way to change things up, and allow me to wash the dust off the old one - I don't yet have cloths in the appropriate liturgical colors. Anytime I get fresh roses (which is not often enough!) I hang a few upside-down to dry, and replace the most discolored ones in the little brass vases.  St. Gerard is out on our altar now, since he is the patron of expectant mothers.  The painting above cost me $1 at a church flea market.  If your family has not yet enthroned the Sacred Heart in your home, I strongly recommend it!

 

And the cabinet below holds almost everything we need for family prayers.

When we have a special intention we'd like to pray for, we light one of the large votives seen on the right, and leave it burning for several days on the altar, carrying our intentions up to Heaven.

Some More Resources

The Domestic Church: The Catholic Home (Fisheaters)

How to Set up a Home Altar (Catholic icing)

Do you have a home altar? 

I'd love to hear what you place on it and how you use it!  (feel free to include links to pictures or posts if you have them)

Planting the Seeds of Faith in Our Children

For months now, Stella has screamed her head off during every bath.  The other day, dreading the impending bath that she needed, I asked my son,  "Sly, what should we do to help Stella enjoy baths more?"  I was expecting him to suggest something like singing to her, or giving her a certain toy to play with....but without hesitation, he responded, "We should pray for her."

Wow.  Yeah.  Tom and I looked at each other: "why didn't we think of that?"  I'm always the person who goes on and on to a friend about some problem I'm having, then ask them for advice only to hear, "well, have you prayed about it?".  Errrr....no, actually.  Oops.  So Sly definitely didn't learn this from me.

Instead, these days it seems that I've been learning so much about holiness from Sly, and his childlike surety in God.  He wants - and expects - to be a Saint with so much more certainty and trust than I can muster.

I've realized that my role in my children's faith formation is perhaps not as important as I thought.  Don't get me wrong - as the parents, Tom and I are responsible for being the primary teachers of the Faith for our kids.  We are charged with an enormously important task, with repercussions that extend to eternity.  But ultimately, our job is just to plant the seeds.  To provide the environment, the experiences, the teachings that will prepare our children's hearts for God.  But it is the Holy Spirit who ultimately "waters" those seeds, and makes them grow.  At only three-and-a-half, Sly has amazed me with some of the things he has come to understand about God.  Things I never had a chance to explain.  There's only one way those thoughts could have come to him, and that is through grace which neither he nor we have merited.

As parents, we lay the groundwork and we help support our children's increasing knowledge of God as it grows and meets challenges.  But it is God alone who gives the grace of faith.  God who enters in to their opened hearts and minds and begins a relationship with them.

In Praise of a Sense of Smell

Most of us have imagined at some time or another how much harder life would be if we lost the ability to see or to hear.  But I have to say that I've never really sat and wondered about how different things would be without a sense of smell.  Sure, I knew it was a nice sense to have, but I didn't realize how much I rely on it....until the past few days.  My sinuses are still so stuffed that I have had close to zero ability to smell for almost three days now.  Blowing my nose doesn't help most of the time, as the obstruction seems to be way up high.  And my pregnancy really limits the medications allowed to me, so I've just been waiting it out.

Here are a couple things I've discovered about the importance of a sense of smell:

1. If someone invented a pill that completely removed your ability to smell, it could be the ultimate diet pill. 
I can't taste anything.  Not a thing.  And food has basically zero appeal to me because of it.  I haven't found myself snacking or eating any junk food, because there's just no pleasure in it if I can't taste it.  I told Tom a bit over-dramatically the other night that "I didn't even care about dinner, since I wouldn't be able to taste it anyways," which prompted him to offer to make it instead.

Whoever taught us back in elementary school that you have all these taste buds on your tongue that can register "sweet, salty, bitter, and...whatever the other one was [sour??]" must have lied.  Or else you still need those flavors to pass through receptors in your nasal passages in order to actually "taste" them, in which case...does a separate sense of taste really even exist?  Yep - such are the deep philosophical questions in my head these days.

Last night, I found myself craving a hot fudge sundae so bad.  I thought at first it was the pregnancy talking, but then I realized - it was because my brain had actually come up with a food that I would be able to get some sort of sensory pleasure out of.  The contrast between the hot and cold temperatures would at least make for an enjoyable eating experience, even without the ability to taste any of it.

I felt fairly uncivilized doing it, but during dinner tonight, I gave my nose one good hard blow right before I took each bite, because it allowed me a fleeting half-second of being able to kind of taste my food.  I had a box of tissues sitting by my plate.  I've sunk pretty low.

2. Moms use their noses for their mom duties all the time.  
The other morning, Sly insisted that he had soaked the bed during the night.  But everything felt dry, and I didn't smell anything, so I left the sheets on his bed and just folded up his pajamas to be reused.  At the end of the day, I dressed Sly back in the same PJs, and sent him over to Daddy to read his bedtime story.  Sly jumped onto Tom's nap, and Tom immediately got a disgusted expression, and said, "ugh! What the heck?  Christine - are these pajamas clean?!" (Allow me to pause, because I'm laughing pretty hard remembering this).  Nope!  Apparently, Sly had been right.  And his whole bed needed to be stripped down and changed, too.

I usually use the sniff-test for random articles of clothing or towels I find strewn on the floor, to determine if they are clean, "clean enough", or dirty.  Without the ability to do this, things have been just ending up in whichever pile my current whim decides to throw them....so far, I haven't had any complaints.  But we'll see. 

The sniff-test is also my main way of knowing when a diaper needs to be changed.  Since I haven't smelled any diaper odors recently, I find that I haven't even been thinking about changing them, so have left several diapers on a bit too long.  Oops.  Tom's the one who keeps "discovering" the offensive diapers now.  I think part of him isn't fully convinced that I actually can't smell them :-)



So don't underestimate the power of your nose, people! I'm really looking forward to having a working one again, so I can get back to enjoying my meals and my coffee, and protecting my family from the various odors that really should be dealt with in a timely manner!

It's Sheenazing! ...and Snow Days

So it looks like someone nominated my little blog for the Sheenazing awards (Best Blog by a Mom category)!  I have no illusions* that mine even approaches the awesomeness of many of the other great Catholic blogs that got nominations, but I am honored that someone thought of me and that I hereby get to put a cool icon of the ever-admired Venerable Archbishop Sheen in my sidebar!

Feel free to vote for me at A Knotted Life, and make sure to check out some of the other great blogs who received nominations.



***

In other news, I suddenly came down with a nasty sinus infection two nights ago.  These sorts of things often hit me when I'm pregnant and my immunity is low.  I'm sneezing and coughing like mad, and my head is filled with pressure.  I still hesitate to say I'm "sick", since I have certain personal guidelines about what that means.  It's annoying to deal with, but I can still function.

But many of you will be proud to know that for the first time in my life, I backed out of two events I was supposed to go to yesterday (with my Catholic moms group, and which I was looking forward to) solely out of consideration for other people who I could potentially infect.  I'm slowly learning.

It's just as well that I've been staying in the house the past few days, since this is what it's looked like outside.

My husband and a number of his co-workers were given permission to work from home all week because of the snow and cold.  I've had very mixed feelings in the past about his work-from-home-days.  It's been mostly nice this time around, as Tom can help a bit with the kids during his breaks, and is already home an hour earlier than usual.

But it can be a little frustrating (for both myself and the kids) to have him in the house all day but *not* really available.  He leaves messes that I'm not used to dealing with during the day, creates more dishes for me to wash, asks constantly what we have to eat or snack on (I know for a fact that he eats at least double when he's at home than when he's at work - what the heck?), and won't let me run the washer/dryer while he's on conference calls (since he takes them in the basement, away from yelling children).  Yesterday as I was feeling all yucky with my cold, dying for a nap and literally crawling up the stairs to bed, Tom stopped me and asked me to make him lunch "before I left him with Sly"...and I have to say I was fairly annoyed!  All I had to do was heat up leftovers in the microwave, but still :-P

But marriage is about sacrifice, and I shouldn't complain too much, since he did take over the duty of sending naughty children back to their beds at naptime while I got to rest, and he even cooked dinner for us tonight (frozen pizza..heh) while I caught up on reading blogs!


* If you happened to read my first draft where I misused the word "allusions" instead of "illusions", I beg you to charitably chalk it up to pregnancy-brain, rather than stupidity!