Tuesday, April 29, 2014

"We Only Make One Model"

There are some families where each of the children looks fairly unique - different hair color, face shape, etc.  And then there are those families where the kids might as well be clones of each other.  You see one of the siblings who you've never even met before, and you immediately say, "he has to be a Jones/Williams/whatever last name."  Our family is turning out to be an example of the latter.  As soon as I saw Linus' little upturned button nose on his ultrasound picture, I knew he would look just like his big siblings.

I've been amazed how much he looks like Sly, especially.  I keep looking back at Sly's old baby photos to compare.  A few times, I've shown a photo to Tom to have him guess which son it is (he's got most of them correct!).

Here's a silly little graphic.  I feel soooo tech-savvy now that Tom showed me I could use Powerpoint to do things like this ;-)

I feel guilty about it, but that photo of Linus in the bottom right is literally the only picture of him I've taken in two weeks (with the exception of our bad family Easter photo, where he's just a little blurry bit of skin peeking out of a car seat).  I guess that's how it goes with third children.  I still love you, little man!


I think I'm doing better dealing with all the kids now.  I was feeling really overwhelmed and hormonal for the first three weeks.  I had a new house where I couldn't find anything I needed, two "big kids" running crazy, and a baby who needed to nurse every time the big kids were finally distracted by a quiet activity.  I could barely keep up with the everyday stuff like laundry or feeding the kids breakfast before 10:30, let alone unpacking or running errands.  I cried a fair number of times, and yelled at the kids much more than I should have.

Two things have really been a lifesaver for me, though.  My mom's group set up a Mealtrain for me.  We've been getting three homecooked (by other people!) meals brought to us each week.  Usually, the portions are generous enough to stretch it into at least one more dinner and a lunch or two during the week.  Also, my mother-in-law gave us a few months of a diaper service.  Once a week, a clean new load of cloth diapers get dropped off on the porch, and I send off the bag of dirties.  No washing diapers!

I'm finally starting to find my rhythm, though.   We're mostly unpacked now, and starting to move into the "project" phase with the house.  So while the house doesn't look as pretty or put-together as I envision it being in the future, at least I know where everything is, and I'm not stepping around boxes anymore.  I've re-established as much of a schedule as I can with a newborn, and I've even taken all three kids out my myself a number of times (yesterday, we made it to three stores in a row!).  It takes longer, and it's a pain strapping and unstrapping all the carseat buckles and stopping to nurse everywhere we go, but it's doable. (My mom gave me the highly-praised ERGO Baby Carrier as a gift when Linus was born, but I still haven't figured out how to nurse in it).

I find myself going back to read this article again and again.  It's one of the most memorable - and re-assuring - posts I've ever read: The Tunnel of Parenthood.  I'm totally there right now.  I just need to keep pushing through!


  1. You are SO in the tunnel right now! Hang in there and keep moving forward (and let me know if we can help with anything).

  2. I return to that concept of the tunnel of parenthood a LOT these days ... sometimes I just wonder what's going to be left of me once we come out the other side. :-/ Hang in there!!

  3. Luckily your one model of kiddo is quite adorable! My husband and I have a very hard time telling our three daughters, born in a three year span, apart in old pictures and usually have to use context to figure it out! And, I know you know this already, but it really does get better! The thought of having four little ones share a bedroom and actually get any sleep, seemed totally impossible a few years ago...now my 18 month old is completely spoiled by his big sisters who sing him lullabies every night until they all fall asleep. At the same time!!! They sure never got that kind of treatment ;) I can honestly say it just keeps getting better, never "easy", but definitely better. I will pray for you while you're in the "tunnel"

    1. Thank you :-) It's *always* good to hear this re-affirmed!

  4. "one model" -- lol!
    I'll be curious how ours turn out, since Chuckie's family fits pretty well in that "one model" category, and my older sister and I look *nothing* alike!

  5. Diaper service is such a great gift idea!!

  6. Ha, we totally thought we only made one model and then Elizabeth came along and BAM! Someone who actually looks like her Dad! Totally weird :P

    I've never gotten particularly good at nursing while babywearing, but it only works for me in the ergo if I have it suuuuuper low on my hips and if the baby's at least a few months old and can latch on his/her own. But by the time they're that old, they *usually* don't need to nurse every second, so it's not as necessary!

  7. Adorable pics! Your kids are sooooo cute! We have one model of each on our hands. Matthew is Brian's clone and Noah is my mini me. It's fair that way. ;) I love the article you referenced. I like how she talks about how NFP allowed them to open the conversation about having a fifth, something they thought wouldn't happen. Brian and I recently had the same experience. I thought we'd be waiting years for another baby, but just last month we started tiptoeing into the territory of "we're kind of ready...maybe...." And because we use NFP, no decision we make about postponing is ever permanent. Love it. And I'm pretty sure with two, energetic boys, my life will always be one very long tunnel. Some days I'm better at accepting that than others!

  8. You're definitely in the tunnel, and you are handling it better than I did. Three kids under 4 was harder than 8 kids under 17, ha ha!!!! It's so true!